Hosting a call this week for one of my private mentoring groups this phrase “get over it” came through loud and clear.  Let me explain.

The call was entitled “Jump (or Pushed) and focussed on 5 clients from the group who, in the last year, have made significant career moves.  

Decisions which they took which have changed the shape of their lives via their careers.

Interviewing the 5 women and asking them the same questions the theme came through I want to share with you.  It may apply to you too  – it certainly used to apply to me.

Before we reach a decision or when we are in the middle of something tough, we “Over” all sorts of things.  We do it with the best intention and yet it can play against us.

• Over-care – thinking all the time about others and how they’re doing.  Worrying what others are thinking about us (err – most of the time they’re not as they’re focussed on themselves)
• Over-share – talking about what’s going on.  Reassuring others by saying what you’re thinking or how tough it is and using precious energy (and seeping the power of keeping your own counsel).
• Over-deliver – trying to compensate for gaps in the team or in others’ performance.  Being someone who doesn’t easily delegate as it can be quicker to do it yourself (a trap, you end up with more work and hold others back!)
• Over-stay – the writing is on the wall, the energy is showing you what you need to do AND you still stay.  Until you don’t….
• Over-think – of course we don’t want to just be scattergun with decisions but our sense of ‘knowing’ a move it on the horizon is always there and needs to be acted upon rather than over-thought.  The opportunity may go to someone else…

All the women have taken new roles or a career break and then a new role.  Or – one has retired and loves every moment of it.

These are key examples  which came through from the call and I asked the women what their best piece of advice is from the experience and here you have it below for yourself:

• Pay attention to what’s happening and take action. 
• If you’re waiting then wait from choice, not fear.
• Put yourself out there being open for opportunity
• Remember who and what’s important to you – you can be replaced fairly easily at work…not in your family.
• STOP being so accommodating and helpful and available – it can hold you AND others back and it’s exhausting.
• Keep your cards close to your chest – good for your energy and keeping who you trust close and staying silent with the rest.

 In other news…

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We had a family dinner this weekend in our new dining room and everything still feels very new to us 3 weeks on BUT it does now feel like home!  Moving home after 20 years in the same place has been more of an emotional rollercoaster than we expected but – it’s changing the shape, pace and focus of our lives which is what we wanted .  

On our doorstep now, the hounds are just thrilled!